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Here’s the surefire method to find the right firm for the right issue

Law departments sometimes have difficulties when they need to find counsel for a specialized area of law. This blog has solved that problem, at least for some particular needs, and is deliberating registering this idea for a business method patent, trademark, copyright and “it’s mine not yours” rights everywhere else.

Shearman & Sterling for British foreign exchange transactions; Baker & Botts for online search issues. For litigation, of course, White & Case. Alcoholic beverage law is Dewey Ballantine. Anything to do with light bulbs and illumination: Fulbright & Jaworski. Horseshoe IP and litigation would go to Reed Smith. Real estate to Jenner & Block while timberland preservation calls for Morrison & Foerster. A law department defending claims of roof construction defects should turn to Simpson Thacher while workers comp matters for luggage carriers means Arnold & Porter. Finally, the go-to firm for maritime law is Jones Day and spelunking liability could only be put in the hands of Bryan Cave.

The pun is the glowest form of humor. No fooling.